|Artist rendering of Dubai Mall's expansion|
Basically Dubai Mall is far too big already. Now this. Each trip to this expanse, which I make every two months os so, follows the same distinct pattern. I enter, and my heart starts to race. All the shops! All the restaurants! 'I am going to stay here for hours,' I think to myself. 'Maybe I'll cancel my dinner/combat class/random social engagement and just shop til I can't shop anymore.' Like clockwork, within two hours, I begin to tire and my feet to hurt. I have become deprived of oxygen; the mall is filling rapidly, and I am grumpy because I want to get back to that store I saw the thing I liked at, and I can't find my way. At some point, tired and thirsty – it's impossible to buy a simple bottle of water in that joint without it being a big deal – I decide to leave. A mild panic sets it at how far from the exit (and taxis) I am. 'Do I even know how to get there anymore'? I think. Suddenly I am in Express trying on a skirt. It's hot, the lights are bright. Next thing I know, I have bought three cupcakes and am carrying them in a fancy box with a spoon taped to the outside. Now I am looking at pink T-shirts with camels on them. Where is the blasted sign for the taxi???? Then, suddenly, there it is. I am in the hot car park. I am climbing in one. I am on my way to Abu Dhabi, swearing never to return.